It’s OKAY… (the Christmas edition)

November 28, 2011 in Life

christmas lights

christmas lights by lavandarfields

 

I don’t know about you, but at this time of the year…

 I always feel a little frazzled. – Finding the ‘right’ gifts… finding the time (and energy) to put up a tree/decorate… coordinate holiday schedule (when is the husband working?) …head to the mall/browsing online. (yuck)

I feel a little overwhelmed.  – Gifts = Money and I would prefer to save it. The husband…. not so much.

I feel a little isolated. – It’s dark by 5pm. Going home to an empty AND dark house makes me feel a little closed off from the world.

All in all, at this time of year I end up feeling a litle sad. 

I thought instead of keeping these feelings to myself, I’d share them with you. I figure there has to be a few of you feeling the same way, right?

It hit me…. instead of fighting it, or thinking “What’s WRONG with me?”, feeling the way I do, why not give myself PERMISSION to feel these things.

Most of the time, the fact that we can’t seem to stop these spinning thoughts USUALLY comes from a place that we think there HAS to be something “WRONG” with us.

What if there is nothing wrong?

Here are a list of things that I want to give myself permision to be OKAY with… If you want to join in, feel free to leave a comment, if not, hope you enjoy mine.

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  • It’s OKAY to have no energy at the end of another boring day at the 9-5 to even THINK of doing anything Christmas-y.
  • It’s OKAY to not want to cook after work, instead to have a bowl of cereal in front of the TV and catch up on my TV shows. *maybe Frosty the Snowman?
  • It’s OKAY to not want to spend hundreds of dollars on Christmas gifts.  Doesn’t mean you don’t care.
  • It’s OKAY to be happy that for the first year in… FOREVER, you won’t have to travel for Christmas. Doesn’t mean you’re selfish.
  • It’s OKAY that you start bawling in the car when you hear “The Christmas Shoes” song on the radio, after knowing you’ve heard it so many times before. *Actually, most Christmas songs make you weapy, know it’s OKAY to let those tears flow.
  • It’s also OKAY to sing REALLY LOUD in the car to all your favorite Christmas songs.
  • It’s OKAY to be upset that your other half is working late when he/should be helping you wrap these dang gifts!
  • It’s OKAY to WANT to send out Christmas cards… and not actually get to it.
  • It’s OKAY to procrastinate on buying christmas gifts. You know you’ll get it done. Go easy on yourself.
  • It’s OKAY that you want the house to magically decorate itself. *Unfortunately it won’t get done without you.
  • It’s OKAY to be a bit more of a NAG this time of year in order to get said house decorated. I mean, you can’t DO everything yourself, can you?
  • It’s OKAY to ask your husband if he’ll bring something home from the restaurant so you can have something for lunch the next day.
  • It’s OKAY to buy the hershey kisses with the Christmas colors to put out when your guests come. *And why not a few (handfuls) for you too?
  • It’s OKAY to be pissed that your house doesn’t look like the pictures in Pottery Barn with all the Christmas decorations *I mean, come on!
  • It’s OKAY that although you feel the Christmas spirit, you aren’t regularly going to a spiritual service.
  • It’s OKAY to not want to stay out late when you’re invited to Christmas shin digs (OR, not even going to them at all, It’s OKAY.)
  • It’s OKAY if you can’t come up with THEE PERFECT GIFT and decide to give them a gift card. *This way they can get what they really like!
  • It’s OKAY that you will forget you are watching what you’re eating when you see all the delicious christmas cookies.
  • It’s OKAY to miss the days when you and your sister woke up at Grandmas house and you believed Santa was real. *SPOILER ALERT.
  • It’s OKAY to be PISSED OFF at yourself that you waited until the last minute and you had to park WAY OUT THERE in the parking lot. *You really did know better. Oh well.

 

…and some personal things to remind yourself to be OKAY with.

  • It’s OKAY to be sad that you wish you were closer with your parents.
  • It’s OKAY that another year went by and you still have those goals you didn’t yet accomplish.
  • It’s OKAY that the holidays means you’re a year older (Birthday on New Years Eve) and still feel like you haven’t yet made your dreams come true.
  • It’s OKAY that you miss your 20’s when you didn’t know what you didn’t know.
  • It’s OKAY that you see gray hairs in the mirror.
  • It’s OKAY to have that “I’m not where I thought I would be by now” feeling. *So many others at your age are feeling the same thing. You’re not the only one.
  • It’s OKAY to be at the beginning of a new chapter of your life. *Better late than never, right?
  • *Big one* It’s OKAY that you totally let yourself go with regards to your health and spirituality. Please forgive yourself about that.
  • It’s OKAY to be emotional that you’re still not pregnant. Especially at this time of year, when that’s ALL you want for Christmas.

 

Thank you for letting me share that with you. Hopefully some of them made you feel better too.

I know I do.

It’s OKAY… (the Christmas edition)

3 Comments

    1. You know what, Kerilyn? It IS okay. You’re so right. And in my own effort to give myself permission:
      – It’s OKAY to feel like your family is bat-sh!t-crazy. They are. And you have your moments too, self.
      – It’s OKAY to not want to take the kids to sit on knock-off Santa’s lap. Sitting on stranger’s laps is NOT something I want to teach my kids okay.
      – It’s OKAY to not answer the phone when family calls.
      – It’s OKAY to not answer the door, too. (*hint, hint* churchy folk). I promise I will still have faith in Him even without your visits this month; even with coffee in hand.

      and lastly, for balance:
      – It’s OKAY to wonder if other LDSers wear makeup, drink coffee and cuss like a sailor..too. {smiles}

    2. J says:

      thank you so much for sharing this ‘it’s okay’ list. Am also partner to a chef, and here we go again with late night longing at his busiest time of the year.

      Have a great festive december and a fab start to 2012! xo

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It’s OKAY… (the Christmas edition)

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